I mounted my horse. I was quivering, nervous. Why are you riding a horse? My inner-self inquired. You've never rode a horse before! What makes you think you can do it now? It condescended. Get off while you can! I shook my head. No! I yelled back. My inner-self shut up. I sighed thankfully. I picked up the reigns and fumbled with them. Finally I started to steer my horse to the arena. I took a deep breath. "Come on." I whispered in my horse's ear. They flicked back in acknowledgement. I walked about with the other riders. None of them acknowledged me. They know you're a newbie! They don't want anything to do with you! My inner-self yelled at me again. Shut up! I yelled back. It complied.
"Okay girls! Pick up the trot!" My trainer said cheerfully. What the heck is a trot? I asked myself. All the other girls started speeding their horses up and contorting their bodies into perfect poses. They praised their horses in high pitched voices. The trainer approached me and my horse where we were standing in the middle of the ring, watching the organized chaos. The trainer explained what a trot was and how to make your horse obey. I walked to the rail and clicked my tongue against the top of my mouth. You sound like an idiot! My mind screamed. Shut up! "Sit down, heels down, chin up, calves tight, elbows relaxed, wrists straight, fingers closed, backs arched, shoulders back," my trainer barked. All of the girls swirled around me and warped their bodies to flawless positions. To me, it just made them look like people with back problems. I, on the other hand, bounced on the back of my horse, just struggling to stay on. Horses twirled around me like a kaleidoscope of fur, dust, and hooves. Suddenly, time froze. All the horses stopped, the riders kept in position, and the dust settled. I stopped my horse by pulling back on the reigns like the other girls had. I almost ran into another horse in the process.
"Okay girls! Pick up the canter! Haley, your lesson is over." Sweat trickled down my neck. I walked down towards the barn. I felt dismissed, diminished, and flat out tired. I put my horse into the crossties. I slipped off the saddle and thumped to the ground. I leaned my head against my horses' face. See! I told you so! Was that really worth it? My inner-self yelled. Why did it always have to be so degrading? My horse snorted. I looked into her sweet brown eyes. Star was a perfect name for this little mare. I loved her name, it went with her face. She smelled like alfalfa and hay. I scratched lovingly at her little white mark on her forehead. It was shaped like a star. Her long black mane tickled my face. She blinked her long lashes and let me keep my face against hers. I felt a bond that possessed y heart my hazel eyes searched her amber ones.
Don't give up. They seemed to whisper. "I won't give up." I promised her vocally. These girls won't get the best of me, at least not yet. You know what? I'm never going to give up! You can throw all the problems you want at me, but they won't bring me down! Never, ever, ever in my entire life am I ever going to give up! I'm going to be one tough chick. I thought to myself. Bring it on!
